Caution, pretty gross

I finally made an appointment with my family doctor, today at 1:00pm (unless I cancel which I am notorious for doing these days). The catalyst was not my concern about being tired and sleeping so much, but the fact that when I run really hard, like speed intervals, I...hmmm...I  don't know how else to say it but be blunt.  I urinate a little and cannot stop it.  It wasn't a big deal when I would just have 20 second intervals and the little dribble would last for about a second.  But when I did 16 intervals of 8 minutes fast/slow, the 2 minutes of running fast 8 times amounted to a LOT of urine.  When I was walking back home, I touched the back of my shorts and they were SOAKED, I mean how embarrassing?  No one could have been able to tell.  I wear running shorts for sweat - they hold moisture and wick it away and they are black, but I think any good running shorts you would not be able to tell if they were wet no matter the color.

I got in the house, immediately took them off and was horrified at what I found, just how wet they and my panties were.  This has never happened to me before and I've been running, a bit off and on, for 2 years.  So this must have something to do with my hysterectomy and I am NOT driving an hour and a half to my GYN who just talks to me scientific terms anyway.

So while I'm there, might as well address the tired concern, and another concern - constipated all the freaking time.  I just know I'm holding about 1.5 - 2 pounds of ick inside me, and I already take stuff for constipation, and used a mild laxative TWICE yesterday.  Nothing. 

I know, way too much information, but remember, I use my blog to document EVERYTHING. 

I don't know.  Exercise induced asthma, now what I think is called stress incontinence where when I run I...get incontinence, does it seem easier to just stop running?  I don't think so.  Why not fix the problems?  For the stress incontinence, if that is indeed what I have, one website said a solution, if it is not serious, is not to cough or run.  How in the world do you not cough?  Uh, that is they type of asthma I have anyway. 

I refuse, REFUSE to let any of these stupid medical conditions keep me from doing ANYTHING.  Not mental illness, not medical issues, I just want to do what I want to do!  I could see if someone told me if I continued running eventually I would not be able to walk because of the condition of my joints or knees or whatever reason people medically have to stop running.  I want to go back to school, so I will.  I want to get back into the workforce when I finish, so I will.  These are all just minor setbacks, everyone has them, not just "mentally ill" people or "people who have had hysterectomies".  Although, sure, I've read complete horror stories about people who have had hysterectomies.  And just the same, who has a mental illness that hasn't tried a psychiatric medication that was worse than the devil himself?

I could get depressed, feel sorry for myself, but I'm not and I don't.  Just be proactive, there's hope, I'll get it fixed.  Just without surgery.  NO MORE FREAKING SURGERIES!   I'm sick to death of having surgeries.  Unless it was something I wanted, like a boob job and liposuction, then I'd be down with it. : )


susie said...

I know there is medication so that you can sleep through the night without getting up to pee...Just what you want, more meds.

I bought the phone book size "In Style" and thought of you!

KansasSunflower said...

LOL Susie, I agree, this month's In Style is HUGE, I couldn't believe it when it came to the mailbox. I just got back from the doctor, I'll make a quick post. : ) And God no, no more meds, but...maybe that's what happens as we age until we're taking a bucket full every day!

Kristy said...

My mother had a surgery years ago to fix the stress incontinence problem and it made it worse. Poise pads are easy to use and you don't have to ever use them except with heavy activity.

KansasSunflower said...

Oh really? So sorry for your mother, it made it WORSE?!? I will research Poise pads - they sound like exactly what I am looking for - thank you! : )

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