Obsessed - I HAVE to know and I will NOT forget

I am really tired of this presidential election.  Maybe not for the same reason everyone else is, but it is very hard for me to read news stories in mainstream media.  I have been trying to step back for my own mental health..  Not out of anger,  but the anxiety it causes from using fear on both sides to manipulate the American public.  Using fear works to manipulate us, so I do not think my self awareness of feeling anxiety when I read political news stories is so strange.  Fear causes anxiety - right?  I have an anxiety disorder, so I am sure I am more cautious and aware of feeling anxious than those who do not deal with it daily.

There IS one news story I just cannot get enough of, and this does happen every now again, that I get so completely...perhaps obsessed with a story?  It has not simply just happened but been building over many weeks.

I know myself.  If the headlines disappear, nothing more is said, I will not forget.  If years go by and there is not an answer?  I will not stop searching until I find SOMETHING to satiate my mind.  I am just like that when I get like this.  I do not know why and trust me, I wish I could change this about myself.  Like a horrible itch that I cannot scratch, but way worse than that.

The Wikileaks story and Julian Assange.  Slowly my interest has been increasing.  I hate to write any type of political opinion in my blog but is it political?  Wait - yes, it is very political in the way it is being used, of course.  No doubt, no question.

This is absolutely what started my curiosity.

I have way more questions than any answers and zero conspiracy theories.  Just lots of questions.

Yes, it is political, the reasons and the timing of the email releasing.  Julian Assange has been very clear about that.

However - everything that has been released is true, they are actual emails that have been written by people, things they have thought, said, etc.  No one is really disputing that.  Nothing much besides.."I cannot recall that email?"

So what the frick?  Publicly threatening Russia with a nuclear war over this?  If they even provided Wikileaks the information at all? If it is over Syria, why publicly is it over emails?  Russian had 40 million people going through nuclear war drills - that amazes me.  Hopefully it is an empty threat, but if so, are we the new North Korea?  OR...even worse, will we actually take millions of innocent lives, including those of children, over emails said in confidence by Hillary's campaign?  I am doing my best to keep up with the email leaks, and I do not understand what is worth killing millions of people in a nuclear war.  To me, the leaks are embarrassing, ugly, and a good analogy is a hot dog.  You really do not want to see how it is made.  But a nuclear war?

But now...where is Julian Assange?  After years of Hillary being documented that she wanted him dead, where is he?  I am NOT a Hillary hater, FYI.  This was documented.  It was even said that a dead man can't leak information, but not by Hillary.  See, this is all just very weird.

I will not be so obsessed once I know where the freak he is and what happened to him, unless that is more of a mystery than it is now.

I am amazed that our government is going to such extreme lengths to silence this person, and I simply want to know...why?  If our country is trying to manipulate into thinking Russia is behind this by threatening them with a nuclear war (I am sure we all took it in different ways - obviously for me, I am thinking what the HELL? and thus started my path down the rabbit trail) and doing all they can to hunt him down, as if that would stop the information from being released...

...what more could happen to increase my interest as to what in the world they are trying to silence, and will I ever find out?

Those that want to stay stuck on being mad at Russia and not move on from that, fine - I really do not care how the information was obtained after the fact.  I just want to know what it IS that has the government absolutely freaked out.

I also wonder...if the leaks continue after the election, will the threat of a nuclear war to Russia still remain?  Why would it, if it truly is about Russia trying to manipulate our election process?

So much does not make any sense at all.

I have to know, I just have to, and that's it.  Trust me, my husband will want me to know as well, because I am sure he will start to get sick of my talking about it all of the time soon.  Have that familiar "little talk" with me eventually.

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